“You’ll get over it…” It’s the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don’t get over it because ‘it” is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never loses. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not made anodyne by death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no-one else can fit it. Why would I want them to?” ― Jeanette Winterson, Written on the Body

“You’ll get over it…” It’s the clichés that cause the trouble. To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don’t get over it because ‘it” is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never loses. How could it? The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not made anodyne by death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no-one else can fit it. Why would I want them to?” 
― Jeanette WintersonWritten on the Body

I can look back now and realize that I deserved better. Unfortunately in the “heat of the moment” we don’t always recognize that we’re going through a form enthrallment/fever with someone when we know deep down that we deserve better. But when we’re in that situation, we throw all of our values, beliefs, and our true authentic self out the window just to fill the emptiness of “what things are missing” in our lives: the attention, the affection, the pleasure, the intimacy, the sadomasochism or whatever “it” is in a person’s life. We spend an inordinate period of time convincing ourselves that we’re in a perfect relationship when, on any other given day, we would see that we’re crazy for even thinking of entering such a situation. We continue to tell ourselves the lie just so that we can enjoy the moment because we rationalize that it’s better to live a lie than live alone.

I can look back now and realize that I deserved better. Unfortunately in the “heat of the moment” we don’t always recognize that we’re going through a form enthrallment/fever with someone when we know deep down that we deserve better. But when we’re in that situation, we throw all of our values, beliefs, and our true authentic self out the window just to fill the emptiness of “what things are missing” in our lives: the attention, the affection, the pleasure, the intimacy, the sadomasochism or whatever “it” is in a person’s life. We spend an inordinate period of time convincing ourselves that we’re in a perfect relationship when, on any other given day, we would see that we’re crazy for even thinking of entering such a situation. We continue to tell ourselves the lie just so that we can enjoy the moment because we rationalize that it’s better to live a lie than live alone.

Our breeddoes not breedour breedbleeds:liar’’s bloodwhore’s bloodsaint’s bloodmartyr’s blood
junkie’s bloodphilosopher’s bloodbitch’s bloodloser’s bloodmadwoman’s bloodthief’s bloodfaggot’s bloodfool’’s bloodoutcast’s bloodvictim’s blood–Charles Gatewood, David Aaron Clark, True Blood

Our breed
does not breed
our breed
bleeds:
liar’’s blood
whore’s blood
saint’s blood
martyr’s blood

junkie’s blood
philosopher’s blood
bitch’s blood
loser’s blood
madwoman’s blood
thief’s blood
faggot’s blood
fool’’s blood
outcast’s blood
victim’s blood
–Charles Gatewood, David Aaron Clark, True Blood

And of course I am afraid, because the transformation of silence into language and action is an act of self-revelation, and that always seems fraught with danger. But my daughter, when I told her of our topic and my difficulty with it, said, “Tell them about how you’re never really a whole person if you remain silent, because there’s always that one little piece inside of you that wants to be spoken out, and if you keep ignoring it, it gets madder and madder and hotter and hotter, and if you don’t speak out one day it will just up and punch you inside the mouth from the inside.” –Audre Lorde, Sister Outsider

And of course I am afraid, because the transformation of silence into language and action is an act of self-revelation, and that always seems fraught with danger. But my daughter, when I told her of our topic and my difficulty with it, said, “Tell them about how you’re never really a whole person if you remain silent, because there’s always that one little piece inside of you that wants to be spoken out, and if you keep ignoring it, it gets madder and madder and hotter and hotter, and if you don’t speak out one day it will just up and punch you inside the mouth from the inside.” –Audre Lorde, Sister Outsider

“If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.” ― Haruki Murakami, Norwegian Wood

“If you only read the books that everyone else is reading, you can only think what everyone else is thinking.” 
― Haruki MurakamiNorwegian Wood

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ― Marianne Williamson, Return to Love

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” 
― Marianne WilliamsonReturn to Love

“Love consists of not looking each other in the eye, but of looking outwardly in the same direction” ― Anaïs Nin

“Love consists of not looking each other in the eye, but of looking outwardly in the same direction” 
― Anaïs Nin

A controversial word is “screw”.
By that I mean not only that it has been used to describe the sex act; and not only that the dictionaries I consulted don’t entirely agree on its source; but also that by the most obscure routes possible the word may have evolved from sexual connotations.
I’ll start with the Oxford English Dictionary, as I usually do.
Let me get the immediately obvious sexual connotation out of the way first. In 1725 something called The New Canting Dictionary was released on the English reading public. It contained for the first time the word screw defined as meaning “to copulate with a Woman.”
This dictionary was marketed as a tool by which an honest man could protect himself against danger by knowing the language of thieves.
Curious though that the contents of the dictionary was largely stolen from an earlier 1698 dictionary. At least screw with this new meaning was an original entry.
The deeper etymology of screw as the OED tells it has the word first showing up in English in 1404 from French, but in French the word applied not to what you might think of as a screw, but instead to the female equivalent, what I’d call a nut.
The American Heritage Dictionary and A&C Black’s Word Origins tie this French word back to a Latin word for a female pig.
The thinking is that perhaps the curly tail of the pig might have influenced the naming of a similarly twisting piece of hardware.
And yet there was another Latin word that might have influenced the naming of the screw, this Latin word meant “ditch” or “trench” and might have been applied to the slot in the top of the screw or some say to the gap between threads of the screw.
The American Heritage Dictionary actually goes so far as to connect the “pig” and the “ditch” meanings back in Indo-European through a root meaning “to cut.”The thinking here being that a pig roots in the soil and cuts a trench.
Of course a word that means ditch or trench is also a good candidate to be a slang expression for a woman’s private parts.
And so, long before English connected screw to sexuality Latin had already done so.

A controversial word is “screw”.

By that I mean not only that it has been used to describe the sex act; and not only that the dictionaries I consulted don’t entirely agree on its source; but also that by the most obscure routes possible the word may have evolved from sexual connotations.

I’ll start with the Oxford English Dictionary, as I usually do.

Let me get the immediately obvious sexual connotation out of the way first. In 1725 something called The New Canting Dictionary was released on the English reading public. It contained for the first time the word screw defined as meaning “to copulate with a Woman.”

This dictionary was marketed as a tool by which an honest man could protect himself against danger by knowing the language of thieves.

Curious though that the contents of the dictionary was largely stolen from an earlier 1698 dictionary. At least screw with this new meaning was an original entry.

The deeper etymology of screw as the OED tells it has the word first showing up in English in 1404 from French, but in French the word applied not to what you might think of as a screw, but instead to the female equivalent, what I’d call a nut.

The American Heritage Dictionary and A&C Black’s Word Origins tie this French word back to a Latin word for a female pig.

The thinking is that perhaps the curly tail of the pig might have influenced the naming of a similarly twisting piece of hardware.

And yet there was another Latin word that might have influenced the naming of the screw, this Latin word meant “ditch” or “trench” and might have been applied to the slot in the top of the screw or some say to the gap between threads of the screw.

The American Heritage Dictionary actually goes so far as to connect the “pig” and the “ditch” meanings back in Indo-European through a root meaning “to cut.”The thinking here being that a pig roots in the soil and cuts a trench.

Of course a word that means ditch or trench is also a good candidate to be a slang expression for a woman’s private parts.

And so, long before English connected screw to sexuality Latin had already done so.

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.” ― Pablo Neruda, 100 Love Sonnets

“I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.” 
― Pablo Neruda100 Love Sonnets

“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.” ― William Shakespeare, All’s Well That Ends Well

“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.” 
― William ShakespeareAll’s Well That Ends Well

“It was like when you make a move in chess and just as you take your finger off the piece, you see the mistake you’ve made, and there’s this panic because you don’t know yet the scale of disaster you’ve left yourself open to.” ― Kazuo Ishiguro, Never Let Me Go

“It was like when you make a move in chess and just as you take your finger off the piece, you see the mistake you’ve made, and there’s this panic because you don’t know yet the scale of disaster you’ve left yourself open to.” 
― Kazuo IshiguroNever Let Me Go